The Wounds in The Men I have Loved

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The Wounds in the Men I have Loved

As I gear up to get back into coaching after a 2 year hiatus (needed to clean up my life and create a stronger foundation to make room for what I want to create in the world). . . I had initially only coached women but more and more I am feeling the call to address the wounds of the masculine.

What I have discovered so far through my own life experiences:
1) Men need to find their purpose. Or at least a general theme to live their life by. (Women have this intrinsic function built right into us. . . ie our womb. . . so even if we don’t figure out how to take over the world or launch the right business, we still we have a purpose to fall back on. . . to bring forth new life.) We are also intrinsically designed to nurture love of all kinds. . . as one of my favorite authors said ‘ a woman’s whole life is a history of the affections’ – Rosemary Sullivan
Men can wander aimlessly wondering what they’re here for. And they can waste alot of time doing that. It’s really important you figure out the answer to that question.
2) Men need to stop caring about what others think about them. MORE SO than women, men care about what other men think. They desperately seek ‘the nod of approval from the world of men’. . . instead of just developing their own intuition and sense of self built upon their own spirit and their own desires. This can negatively shape a man’s entire life. From picking the wrong career just because it makes money, to marrying the wrong woman because he thought it was what would make everyone happy, to accruing the wrong kinds of friends and support systems just because he needed a place to belong.
3) Men need to take it easy on themselves. Meaning develop a sense of compassion for themselves and for others when they make mistakes. Also to develop a healthy sense of self-permission to be vulnerable, feel pain and struggle, and all the difficult emotions. (And find a safe place to express them without being shamed).
4) We need to develop a sense of social permission for men to develop and express their feminine side. This means emotion, vulnerability, creativity, receptivity, and an ability to accept and receive LOVE. Too often I see men turning away love because they don’t feel worthy of it yet. They’re not (rich/accomplished/powerful/established…) enough yet to feel capable of caring for and providing for a woman. (Newsflash: we can provide for ourselves now, and really only need you to show up for us and BE with us in your whole sense of PRESENCE, so we can feel connected to you and share our love).
5) Men need to kick their perfectionism habit! Not every woman is looking for a rich man to provide for her anymore. More and more of us are on the path of self-realization and self-actualization and just want to meet a conscious man to GROW and EVOLVE with. It has nothing to do with money for a conscious woman. Conscious people know that the real world exists inside our hearts and spirits; and that we are here to love and heal the planet together. So focusing all your efforts on achieving external success is a drastic mis-focus of your amazing energy and power.
6) We love you for WHO YOU ARE and not WHAT YOU DO or WHAT YOU HAVE.
Wishing you guys can start to get this; and just allow yourselves to be happy when you meet the right woman; rather than feeling inadequate and afraid you won’t be good enough for her.
Just some thoughts and love going out to you men today  xox

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Source: The Law of Divine Compensation by Marianne Williamson

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